Thursday, May 31, 2007

The A-Rod Apologete: Cheating on his Wife? On the Field?

So apparently Alex Rodriguez is having an extra-marital affair. A professional athlete cheating on his wife? You could knock me over with a feather! Sports writers have been keeping such things secret, since the cigar-chomping, derby-wearing days. Suddenly they choose to break precedent and smear A-Rod's name. Thank you, New York Post. Last summer, they exposed Rodriguez as a (gasp!) sunbather. Yesterday, they ran "Lindsay Blo-han" on the front page and "Stray-Rod" on the back page. Job well done; equal parts clever and hard-hitting! Today their front page story was "A-Rod Spotted with Blond in 5 Cities". If you don't think they have an anti-A-Rod agenda, you are completely lost.

Yesterday Alex Rodriguez shouted something while passing Blue Jays third baseman Howie Clark, distracting him and causing him to let a routine pop-up fall. If Pete Rose did it in 1975, it would have been considered a heady play, by a guy who just wants to win. Since it was A-Rod, it was labeled a dirty play. Was it Bush League? Sure, but I love it. In fact, I hope this is a sign of things to come.

Alex, besides me, nobody likes you anyway. Therefore, you should just embrace your inner-heel. Be the dick everybody thinks you are. Tell children that there is no Santa Claus. Trip old ladies. Move to the San Fernando Valley, dye your hair blond, and a join a dojo whose sole purpose is to torment the working-class Italian kid that just moved from Jersey. Enjoy yourself. What's the worst that can happen? You'll get bad press?

1 comment:

Jimer said...

Good take, Tremont. You are a good writer.