Monday, January 21, 2008
Eight Overrated Ladies of the 80s (#1): The Chinese Democracy of Posts
Three months after I began this awful countdown, it reaches its merciful conclusion. I really know how to write a column, huh? Build a modest amount of interest, wait until everyone has forgotten about it, then return with a lackluster post. Better never than late.
1) Daryl Hannah- No woman has ever better fit the phrase "looks good from far, but far from good". Tall, blonde, with a super model figure, Daryl Hannah has the shell of truly gorgeous woman. I guess that is enough for most to find her attractive. However something is seriously amiss with this would-be beauty.
It's tough to perfectly pinpoint what it is about her face that I find so unappealing. She just vaguely gives off the vibe that she was slapped together in a "Weird Science" type experiment, but something went slightly wrong. Her sunken features give her the appearance of the re-animated corpse of a gorgeous woman who past away just long enough to start decomposing. Like Mr. Bentley on "The Jeffersons", her head is too long, making her look like the world's shortest sufferer of giantism.
Frustration with her deceiving ugliness led Jackson Browne to physically abuse Daryl Hannah during their relationship. I can't blame him. JFK Jr. went so far as to crash his plane to escape the haunting images of her grotesque face.
And this is how this series ends. Not with a bang, but with a whimper.