Saturday, July 21, 2007

AssScott


Scott Olsen, you have made the leap! Before tonight, we knew you were a bit of a problem. You had had a couple of dust-ups with managers and teammates and just this week the Marlins suspended you for some vague violation of team rules. Alas, we did not have that signature disgraceful act that would place you in the Pac Man Jones/ Elijah Dukes/ Stephen Jackson/ Ron Artest echelon of sociopaths.


But today, my friend, you did it. Like Lebron in Game 5 against the Pistons, you have announced your arrival in no uncertain terms. Driving drunk, refusing to pull over, then kicking the cops. You're an inspiration.


One word of caution from your friends at SYHD. You are only 23 and are still a promising young pitcher and malefactor. However, in order for your delinquency to remain relevant, you are going to have to step it up on the field. At the very least, you must become a legitimate number two starters for teams to continue to put up with your bullshit. Make yourself absolutely indispensable and you could give me 15 more years of material.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

No me gusta Scott Olsen

Tremont said...

I love how Sergio Mitre was born and raised in Cali, but still prefers to post blog comments in his ancestral tongue