Watching some of the LSU/Ole Miss game, I stumbled upon a mystery for the ages. How does the above pictured gentleman acquire the name Brent Schaeffer? First, Brent is a name usually reserved for heartland white boys. I have never met, nor heard of, a black dude with the name. Secondly Schaeffer is a German surname. Early German Americans were famously abolitionist. Obviously this doesn't mean that there wasn't the odd German slave owner, but they were few and far between.
Does anybody have an answer to my question? My best guess is that Mekhi Phifer, while on vacation to the Dominican Republic with his family, and Vladamir Guerrero bumped uglies as 12 year old children. To spare himself the shame of having the first ever anal birth, Phifer quickly put the child up for adoption and young Brent was taken in by a white family. Could somebody either confirm or deny my theory?